Six Months
by OfficiallyObsessedwithPyro
Summary: Welcome to Sunnydale High School. School of vampire lesbians, goddess ghosts, vengence demons, and Harmony Kendall: resident octopus girl! Now with added somewhatnotreallyepilogue 090907
1. Hi, I'm Sue

Six Months

Hi, I'm Sue. HOW DO YOU DO?!

Also known as The Product Of Reading Too Much Bad Fan Fiction With Similar Plots While Listening To Johnny Cash...

* * *

William "Spike" Giles strutted his hot self down the hallways of Sunnydale High, leather duster swaying and black Dockers thumping. She had to be here _somewhere_. 

The object of his fruitless search, Elizabeth Summers, was nowhere to be seen.

And if she had been in the direct vicinity he would have spotted her.

At least, that's what he thought.

Elizabeth Summers, however, did not bother making her presence known most days anyway, and unknowingly shied away from his line of sight to disappear between two upperclassmen standing nearby. Better to not make a scene. So much commotion in the hall must mean a new student, and she had no intention of meeting them.

_You may my glories and my state depose:_

_But not my griefs---_

_Still am I king of those._

"Xander...?" William spoke to a boy he'd seen Elizabeth talking with on occasion before he'd moved away, "Have you seen Elizabeth?"

The dark-haired boy looked at him as if he had grown three heads out of his foot. "Huh?"

William was well-known for his lack of patience. He nearly growled out, "Elizabeth Summers. Where is she?"

The hallway suddenly seemed too quiet in William's mind. Possibly due to the fact that the majority of the population in the hall had turned to watch the two boys' reactions to one another.

"Uh..." Was Xander's intelligent answer.

William was _not_ liking this. Not only were the generally nice-looking kids giving him amused looks, as if they knew something he didn't, but Xander was suddenly unresponsive and hadn't even bothered to shut his own locker before scrambling off to class.

Oh-kay.

"Anyone seen Elizabeth Summers lately?" He called out to the other students.

A leggy brunette William recognized as Cordelia Chase adjusted her low-cut blouse and questioned saucily, "What would you want with her for?"

William didn't even dignify her lack of competence for the English language with a response, only a withering glare that made her back up a few steps to the safety of her clique.

William was about to start seething. He had _not_ spent six _bloody_ months in Los Angeles revamping his _entire_ existence just to return and be met with these pathetic excuses for humans that wouldn't _tell him where the hell his best friend was_.

A redhead decked out in what William could only identify as lots of sexy leather caught his attention. "She..she might be in the art room." The light stutter wasn't nervousness, but uncertainty in the truth of her words. Why William believed the two to be so substantially different, he couldn't say.

A blonde appeared behind the redhead and wrapped her arms around the shorter girl's waist. "Hey, baby."

"Tara," The redhead suddenly seemed much more energetic. "He's looking for...uh, Elizabeth."

The blonde, presumably Tara, pointed to the first right hallway that branched off from the main one they were currently standing in, "You follow that and it's the last one on the left."

"Thanks, pet." William told them, making his way in the direction she'd pointed out. The spectators quickly shuffled away towards their classes when he'd turned away and the glow of an imminent confrontation and/or situation ebbed.

As he stalked off, nearly skipping at the prospect that he'd soon see his best friend that he'd been secretly crushing for years upon years, he vaguely realized that the lesbian chits he'd just spoken with seemed familiar...

* * *

theend 


	2. Crazy for lovin' you

Six Months

I'm crazy for lovin' you. Crazy for thinking that my love could hold you...

Also known as The Product Of Reading Too Much Bad Fan Fiction While Listening To Johnny Cash..and now Patsy Cline, Part Two...

* * *

The spectators quickly shuffled away towards their classes when he'd turned away and the glow of an imminent confrontation and/or situation ebbed.

As he stalked off, nearly skipping at the prospect that he'd soon see his best friend that he'd been secretly crushing on for years upon years, he vaguely realized that the lesbian chits he'd just spoken with seemed familiar...

But that seemed like a thought for another time.

All other thoughts disappeared the moment he spotted the last door on the left. He was about to see his best friend. He was about to confess that she had been all he'd thought about his time in Los Angeles. He was about to tell her that nowhere without her would ever be home.

He grasped the door handle firmly, gathering up all of his strength, and pushed the door open. Standing in the doorway, he was surprised to see that this art room was different from the rest. All the art pieces were covered with gauzy white sheets and the windows were tinted gray. In the front of the room was the bust of Pallas set in marble on a black wood stand.

Amongst the sheet-covered artwork, William could make out golden blonde hair. Dodging a few easels, he found himself standing directly behind the girl he'd waited so long to see. A tentative hand shot out to tap her on the shoulder as to gather her attention, but...

The portrait she was working on stopped him short.

It looked like she was...flying. His Elizabeth was on canvas, diving into a mass of light just as the sun was coming up in the background. Blonde hair whipped back in the wind, eyes shut in acceptance. Gnarled metal works behind her where she'd started running...

"Doing a self-portrait, pet?" His sudden question startled her so much the paint brush she'd been holding flew out of her hands to smack the statue of Pallas right in the eye.

"Eeeek! Don't do that!" Her voice was different than he remembered...and his brow furrowed. That didn't sound like his girl at all.

She turned and nothing and everything made sense again. Her blue eyes studied him for a moment, and she cried out, "Blondie Bear!" before grabbing him to her in a bone-crushing embrace. William literally saw his life flash before his eyes.

"Harmony--bloody--Kendall!"

**What the hell?!**

* * *

theend 


	3. There's nothin' like it

Six Months

I can't wait to get on the road again. There's nothing like it...

Also known as The Product Of Reading Too Much Bad Fan Fiction With The Same Plot While Listening To Johnny Cash..and Patsy Cline...and now Willy Nelson Part Three...

* * *

"Harmony--bloody--Kendall!"

**What the hell?!**

"Oh, Blondie Bear, I've missed you so! You never _called_ me!" Harmony wailed, hugging him even tighter. William fought off the urge to cry. Not Elizabeth. _Definitely_ not Elizabeth.

"Uh, Harm, pet, um, y'mind lettin' go?" His question went ignored. "Harm?"

Ever oblivious, Harmony attempted to moan out, "I am _never_ letting you go again." William entertained the thought of proclaiming that the brainless bimbo was in actuality an octopus and calling Animal Control. They'd know what to do. The image of Harmony Kendall in a purple suit with two pairs of stuffed purple pantyhose strapped to her waist almost made him smile.

Operative word: Almost.

"Harmony--bleedin' let _go_!"

That one got her attention. Gigantic crocodile tears filled her eyes. "Blondie Bear, you don't want..." she motioned down to her body "...anymore?"

William would've rolled his eyes if he didn't need something from her. "Look, Harm, that thing with you an' me was last year." She snaked a hand up his shirt and he jumped back, "Harmony, have you seen Elizabeth?"

Harmony gave him a curious look, blinked, and then flipped her hair back. "_What_?"

William couldn't hold it back. He slapped his forehead with his hand. Ow. Maybe a little too hard.

"Harmony," William said, trying to speak slowly, "Have you," he pointed to her, which she nodded her pretty little head to in understanding, grabbing his hand and putting it to her breast. Okay, obviously she didn't. So William snatched his hand back, shook his head, and tried again. "You. Have you seen Lizzie?"

"Lizzie?"

And now came the anger.

"Lizzie. Elizabeth. Elizabeth Summers?" He tried, he really did, but poor William was getting tired.

"Oh, of _course_, you silly goose," Harmony giggled, "Of course I've seen her. I _did_ create her, after all."

* * *

theend 


	4. If you've got the money, honey

Six Months

If you've got the money, honey, I've got the time...

Also known as The Product Of Reading Too Much Bad Fan Fiction With The Same Plot While Listening To Johnny Cash..and Patsy Cline..and Willy Nelson Part Four...

* * *

"Oh, of _course_, you silly goose," Harmony giggled, "Of course I've seen her. I _did_ create her, after all."

William was so caught up in the idea that Harmony knew where his girl was that it took his brain a moment to unscramble the last sentence she'd said.

"Ah--!" Happy. "Wuh?" Hold on. Computing. "Wa, wa, wuh?"

During his little mind glitch, Harmony had gone back to examining her work---on canvas and on her nails---so it took William a while to get her back on topic. When he finally did, though, after many a hug and grope, he didn't like what he was hearing.

"Wha' the bloody hell y'mean you 'created' her?" William's frustrated tone was not lost on the blonde ditz before him.

"Just what I said, Blondie Bear," Harmony replied cheekily, seemingly liking his "serious face".

"You're gonna haveta explain that one, Harm."

Harmony gathered some of her blonde hair around a finger and started twisting. William recalled that Elizabeth would never twist her hair like that. She always complained that if she slept before combing them out she'd look like hell in the morning.

_"And a hell-like Lizzie in the morning is not a sight you wanna see, Will."_

But back to the matter at hand.

"Well, you see, baby, there was this new girl, and her name was Annie or Anya or something, and she invited me over to her house---..."

"Get to the point, Harm." William began to wring his hands. Did she _like_ keeping him in suspense?

"Yes, well, when I got there she asked me if I was mad at a boy--namely you--for breaking up with me, and well, she showed me all of this freaky stuff, candles and shiny things. And '**poof**!' Instant Lizzie Summers."

William didn't want to think about what that meant.

Did that mean that everything he'd felt...everything he'd known...

"She said that there were some wheee loopy holes and that if something happened she'd turn into a ghost, I think. Like, she'd be...what was it, tied, that's it...she'd be tied to something on the phys. ed. plane." Harmony giggled, and William tried not to slug her. "And as long as she was tied, the memories would be still there."

William wanted to cry.

"Get out of here, Harm." His voice was like stone. "Get. Now."

Harmony may not be all there in the head, but she knew when to not push it. She grabbed her school bag and skirted out the door.

Blinded by held-back tears, William grabbed the closest thing--a tissue blade from the side table--and plunged it into the magnificent painting Harmony had been working on.

Plunged it right into the heart of his girl.

* * *

theend 


	5. For you to walk out on me

Six Months

The last thing I needed the first thing this morning was for you to walk out on me...

Also known as The Product Of Reading Too Much Bad Fan Fiction With The Same Plot While Listening To Johnny Cash..and Patsy Cline..and Willy Nelson Part Five...

* * *

Blinded by held-back tears, William grabbed the closest thing--a tissue blade from the side table--and plunged it into the magnificent painting Harmony had been working on.

Plunged it right into the heart of his girl.

His tears did little to ebb his pain. He screamed until his throat hurt so unbearably that he could make no other sound. He tore apart everything he could get his hands on in the room. It seemed like hours. Finally he dropped to the ground and sat. Because there wasn't much else he could do.

"Are you quite done?"

The voice startled him out of his thoughtless acts, broke through his defenses, and made his heart jump. William was almost afraid to raise his gaze.

"Lizzie?" William asked tentatively, scared to be wrong.

"Duh. Could you help me? Harmony sure did a number on my statue." She passed a hand through a washcloth to demonstrate. "It's not like I can clean it up on my own."

She looked the same as she did the day he left. Her golden blonde hair was swept up in a half-ponytail, the rest spilling over her shoulders in a slight curl. Her eyes were kind as always, pulling him in. Her skin, the slightest bit tan.

The most surprising about her appearance was her clothing. A white tank top that stopped right above her navel, showing a small portion of skin, and a pair of blue jeans that hung just low enough on her hips. No shoes, no accessories, nothing special.

And still she was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen.

Noticing his gaze, she began to mess with her hair and clothing self-consciously. "What? Do I have something on my face--hair? C'mon, Will, don't look at me like that." Her squirming caught his attention and he smiled.

"No, pet, nothin' wrong with you."

_Never anything wrong with you._

* * *

theend 


	6. Six Months Version 20!

Six Months Version 2.0!

Okay, so...yeah. Didn't go exactly like I wanted it to. But now this is Six Months, Version 2.0!!! Heck yeah!

Okay, okay. I'm just gonna do the rundown before getting on with it.

So this is continuing after the first couple of chapters of the original Six Months story, except after chapter "san" AKA three it goes off in a totally different direction. It'd help if you actually read to where I tell you to, but...yeah. Most people here are lazy, and the only reason you're still reading this is that you don't want to go back and read the first couple of chapters at a different link.

...Just read below:

William "Spike" Giles has just returned from a six month stint in Los Angeles. Yes, this is partially where the title comes from. No, don't ask any more questions about the stupid title. I don't like titles. Yes, I am going to be like everyone else and pretend that "British" means "Related To Giles."

Okay, so he's searching, searching, searching the hallways of Sunnydale High School for the apple of his eye and his secret-but-not-so-secret best friend and love, Elizabeth Summers. Not known as Buffy, even though that is her name. This is set in an alternate universe, and I have made the time to address this for the fact that a reviewer once had a problem with alternate universes being, y'know, alternative. Anyhoo, after a long drawn out hoo ha with the scattered Scoobies, Spike ends up on the trail of the elusive Elizabeth.

Yay, Spike!

Hem. Sorry. So he's passing the lesbian couple of Willow and Tara and they point him off to the art room, but they know something he doesn't know...

Cue the dramatic music.

In the music...wait, no, that's a diff--- anyway, he stumbles into the art room looking the best of his spexy self, and there painting a portrait of his dearest Elizabeth is...gasp! Harmony Kendall??? The hell, I was high when I wrote this.

Okay, so she jumps him, of course, and it takes far too long to pry all the information out of her, yes, of course, and then finally she can tell Spike where his beloved is.

Except she's going to be cryptic and weird and say, "Of course I know where she is; I created her!"

Okay, ew. No, she is not Buffy/Elizabeth's mother. Ew. I didn't think of that when I wrote it. I don't think so. I don't remem---oh, fuck it.

So after that, this happens:

This is the alternate ending, people. I'm serious. Read below the below sign.

Below, below.

BELOW:

"Oh, of course, you silly goose," Harmony giggled, "Of course I've seen her. I did create her, after all."

William was so caught up in the idea that Harmony knew where his girl was that it took his brain a moment to unscramble the last sentence she'd said.

"Ah--!" Happy. "Wuh?" Hold on. Computing. "Wa, wa, wuh?"

During his little mind glitch, Harmony had gone back to examining her work---on canvas and on her nails---so it took William a while to get her back on topic. When he finally did, though, after many a hug and grope, he didn't like what he was hearing.

"Wha' the bloody hell y'mean you 'created' her?" William's frustrated tone was not lost on the blonde ditz before him.

"Just what I said, Blondie Bear," Harmony replied cheekily, seemingly liking his "serious face."

"You're gonna haveta explain that one, Harm."

Harmony gathered some of her blonde hair around a finger and started twisting. William recalled that Elizabeth would never twist her hair like that. She always complained that if she slept before combing them out she'd look like hell in the morning.

"And a hell-like Lizzie in the morning is not a sight you wanna see, Will."

But back to the matter at hand.

"Well, you see, baby, there was this new girl, and her name was Annie or Anya or...something like---like, Russian! ---or something and she invited me over to her new house because she was wanting to throw a shindig---..."

"Get to the point, Harm." William began to wring his hands. Did she enjoy keeping him in such suspense?

"Yes, well, I was just getting there, honey love. And when I got there she asked my why I was so mad at the world, and I was like, it was all your fault for breaking up with me and well, she totally started making the moves on me and well, there were candles."

"Harmony...point?"

"Sorry, baby. I got sidetracked." William resisted killing her right then and there. "So, anyway, there were candles, and this stuff that smelled really good that burned and 'poof!' Instant Lizzie Summers."

William didn't want to think about what that meant.

Actually, William didn't get to want to think about what that meant. He was too busy gaping at the girl that had just entered the room.

Buffy: The Vampire Slayer! brandishing a broad sword and decked out in usual drab, bursts through the door.

"What the hell are you doing, Kendall?" She screams at Harmony, "Trying to live out one of your 'Getting Booty From Spike In An Alternate High School Universe' fantasies again? Honestly! This is the sixth time this month that I've had to pull your ass out of these messes---..." The rant continued as Buffy: The Vampire Slayer! brandishing a broad sword and decked out in usual drab grabs said blonde bimbo and drags her out by her hair.

"Having a troublemaker like Andrew is one thing, but this..."

Well, at least William didn't have to think about the implications of Harmony's comments.

Okay, I'm done.

theend.


End file.
